Colorful Characters (And We Don't Mean The Fishes)

[seasnake]

While posing for a picture at 90', after just reaching the bottom on this nice wreck we have here locally, The Arrow, an "instructor" and a "divemaster" completed their descent by CRASHING into the bottom directly between photographer and subject. I mean literally CRASHING . . . their descent rate was probably more like 75 ATMOSPHERES per minute and the resulting silt cloud where they struck the bottom would make you think a meteorite had just hit. As they were engulfed by their own silt cloud that had now destroyed our photo op, they gave us the ok signal and crawled off along the bottom.

(Best I could come up with on short notice . . . )

[Daddy-h2O]

Thanks for the mention Pinay, but I have no idea what balut is , and from what I read over at that other thread , I'm not sure I want too. I do have some rather interesting character stories that I may relate, but you will have to pardon some languge.
During a surface Interval at a Local Shore Dive

Two divers enter the water, both decked out well beyond thier physical capacity, both we found out later were in thier early 70's and recently certified, both wore 7mm suits,gloves and hoods, both had very impressive brand new techie-like gear bc, knives, lights, more gadgets than you see in any 10 LDS, and don't forget the back ups. Both dropped the "f" bomb ever 2-3 words to sound impressive. and both were diving doubles, Both swore that snorkles were worthless, and that they filled them up with gunpowder and set them off the second they got thier certs.
The entry at the time was 2 steps and drop and you were on the wreck, it is a really cool wreck dive.
So in goes these two old guys step,...step...splash.....splash... away they go!

With in 2 minutes the one hits the surface like he was punched in the face, remember I am on shore watching this, and he is screaming " I flossed min f#$^&* (This was the only understandable word) feith" and is pounding the water with his hands. It took a minute but we relized he lost his teeth! His buddy surfaced less than a minute later completly unfazed over the whole deal. They get out huff the gear up to the car, ask directions for coffee and say they will be right back.

15-20 min later two diver surface and calls us over to show us "this stange find", right on what was remaining of part of the deck he found a full set of upper teeth! he figured they couldn't be old and thought he would bring them up. We suggested that he keep them because we didn't think the owner was going to return, he said no and left them there on a large rock next to the entrance. Just as this diver had his car packed and was leaving the two old guys show up, now walking around in ratty street clothes and just walking back and forth, Toothless finally spots his teeth drops several "f" bombs,declared them his and they head off never to be seen again.

Of all the gear I think the teeth had the longest bottom time!!

[santelmo]

hahahaha! LMAO! nice stories!

[PinayDiver]

I very much enjoyed reading through your stories! In fact, an officemate just asked why I kept bursting out in laughter. Thanks Ron and h20 (and Santelmo too), I needed that

More! More!

...but I guess for now the ball is back in my court? (One-for-one and all that...)

We were doing Tubbataha out on the Sulu Seas for the entire last week of May when blue skies turned grey. With the onslaught of wind and rain, our charter boat pitched and rolled. I chose to stay up on deck because I figured looking out on the horizon helped with possible dizziness better than being cooped up in my cabin.

Soon enough however, one guy couldn’t help but hurl his lunch over the rail (look out down below!). Then, like a wave, up to four people followed suit with their own gagging-and-heaving. It was not a pretty sight.

So, with all that going on, no one noticed early enough that one of the chase boats tethered to the side of our “mother boat” was being tossed by swells -- hard enough for it to slip under and then turn over! Unfortunately, in that very chase boat were the BCs, regs, and other gear of a group of divers supposedly scheduled to head out (before the weather turned).

I remember that everyone was suddenly on one side of our boat, watching the submerged chase boat as it receded under. At least two guys hurriedly suited up in a valiant effort to rescue the gear but by then these were sunk to impossible depths.

The pity for this group who lost their gear (and consequently, the chance to go out on the last few precious dives of the trip) was quite palpable.

Then came the announcement: the company’s dive shop back in Manila will outfit these guys with top-of-the-line replacements for everything they lost—down to every reel, slate or whatever equipment declared hooked to their BCs when these went down.

Human nature being what it is, pity quickly turned to envy, and there was actual talk of maybe tossing one’s own battered gear (include the rusty dive knife! and the flooded torch!) overboard “in sympathy” too.

[santelmo]

oooh! ooooh! i have one. i remember a story from Gigi that her friend/student once got so narc that she kept tearing a large Fan coral. just imagine seeing a diver tearing a fan coral while laughing and making those weird noises.... since then her nickname has been "Narc"

[santelmo]

wow! brand new stuff!!! envy...envy.... lucky divers....

[PinayDiver]

oooh! ooooh! i have one. i remember a story from Gigi that her friend/student once got so narc that she kept tearing a large Fan coral. just imagine seeing a diver tearing a fan coral while laughing and making those weird noises.... since then her nickname has been "Narc"

Shucks, she must've thought she was having a salad

My first instructor once had a student who just spaced out at 110 feet. She closed her eyes, curled up, and seemingly went to sleep. Her breathing was even enough.

He said he kept the reg in her mouth as he finned up with her. He was relieved to see her open her eyes in a minute or so.

She later told him she had been dreaming that she was back in her bed at the resort.

[Daddy-h2O]

I help out with student divers doing open waters. Recently I have been getting a little bored and need to liven things up some. As the first dive here in Upstate New York is a shore dive, and the First dive is typically when the students get all of the wet suit on. I have had them jump on one foot or raise their arm like a chickens wing to help move the neoprene around some when it appears "bunched" This is really funny when you get one of those big burly guys to flap around like a chicken.

I had one student that was bald, and every time his mask would leak I would take my palm and rub it upwards over my forehead and ask him to do the same. He would repeat this evertime without fail, towards the end he stopped giving me a rounded ok. He had a good sence of humor about it too.

I want to do this,
At the end of the last check out dive, I want to call them all over to look at a small turtle tucked into the palm of my hand and as the last one looks at it, I am going to start crushing it. After about 15-20 sec. I will show them that it is rubber. But my instructor says I have to be real careful who I pull this one on.

And I want to try Alka Seltzer at 80'

Yes I know these are not the nicest thing I can do, but I do get bored and this is where my mind takes me...

[santelmo]

Shucks, she must've thought she was having a salad

My first instructor once had a student who just spaced out at 110 feet. She closed her eyes, curled up, and seemingly went to sleep. Her breathing was even enough.

He said he kept the reg in her mouth as he finned up with her. He was relieved to see her open her eyes in a minute or so.

She later told him she had been dreaming that she was back in her bed at the resort.

scary..... although i usually feel sleepy too during my dives...