SoCal,
What is this? A touchie, feelie trip? What, I have to get in touch with my inner-self? Hold hands? Sing Koom-by-Ya? Yikes I am out of here!!!! I thought I was meant to enjoy this time, not endure it! Time for a new hobby.
Seriously, I find that a good divemaster will give you a hand with clipping up stage bottles (holding/handing them for you), and other such gear, then assissting in the climbing back on the boat. Especially if the seas have picked up between going in and coming out (and when don't they?). Taking the camera and SMB to leave your hands free to climb on board.
A little shift in topic: Who the @#$^%@# thought that having a boat deck that sits 5-6 feet (2 meters) above water level is a good thing? I damn near kill myself climbing the ladder with doubles and all!!